Communication: You Are Chopping, But Are the Chips Flying?  

Do you ever lie awake at night obsessing over not being able to get through to someone?  Despite all of your great wisdom, experience, and eloquence, is your message just not heard?  Do repeated attempts to connect with your audience fall on deaf ears or even make matters worse?Have you ever stopped to realize that it may not be them, but you?  

The reality—most of our communication activities are triggered responses based on how messages are delivered to us.  For example, notice how the communication styles of particular people impacts you.  A whinny voice, a rolling of the eyes, constant interruption, a belittling tone, or an I’m-smarter-than-you attitude.  These types of frustrations can each lead to the first step in miscommunication.

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Desktop Coach - What You Need to Know To Ensure Your Communication Lands

Tip #1:  An effective communicator possesses the ability to adjust their style and approach while communicating in order to ensure their message is received.  To do this, observe the communication preferences of others by examining their words, tones, facial expression, gestures and postures.  Then, “flex” your style to meet their preference.

Tip #2:  Non-productive, undesirable behavior is generally a defense mechanism when our psychological needs are not being met, resulting in miscommunication.  In order for your needs to be met, try to facilitate a comfortable and non-threatening communication exchange.  If needed, take a breath and think about what you are delivering.

Tip #3:  When trying to connect with another person, remember to be aware of HOW you are communicating, not WHAT you are communicating.  You can do this by being cognizant of your tone, posture, gestures, and facial expressions.  Look in a mirror if it helps to gain awareness.

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"You Are Chopping But Are the Chips Flying?"
by Daniel Collett